1
00:00:30,870 --> 00:00:31,920
White. White.

2
00:00:33,530 --> 00:00:34,580
Coloured.

3
00:00:35,530 --> 00:00:36,580
White.

4
00:00:37,910 --> 00:00:38,960
Coloured.

5
00:00:41,150 --> 00:00:42,290
You can't do that.

6
00:00:42,670 --> 00:00:44,250
My gym socks will go pink.

7
00:00:44,530 --> 00:00:45,910
No, they won't. They will.

8
00:00:46,190 --> 00:00:48,630
I have done washing before, you know.

9
00:00:49,890 --> 00:00:50,940
But what if they do?

10
00:00:50,941 --> 00:00:53,549
Why don't you just make me wear one of
your dresses?

11
00:00:53,550 --> 00:00:56,620
Oh, no, I couldn't do that. You can save
up for your own dresses.

12
00:00:59,470 --> 00:01:01,880
What are you doing? My pink T -shirt
will go blue.

13
00:01:02,150 --> 00:01:04,230
No, it won't. That's my favourite one.

14
00:01:04,450 --> 00:01:05,500
It'll be all right.

15
00:01:06,050 --> 00:01:08,580
Don't you know the clothes you mix have
to be fast?

16
00:01:08,581 --> 00:01:12,069
They have to be Linford Christie in this
house or they'll make it to the washing

17
00:01:12,070 --> 00:01:13,120
machine.

18
00:01:28,871 --> 00:01:31,449
Aren't you getting ready?

19
00:01:31,450 --> 00:01:32,289
What for?

20
00:01:32,290 --> 00:01:35,829
It's Saturday night. You're usually out
of the front door quicker than Cecil

21
00:01:35,830 --> 00:01:37,090
Parkinson at Mothercare.

22
00:01:37,650 --> 00:01:40,930
Are you trying to stop me? I don't. You
do?

23
00:01:41,530 --> 00:01:43,150
You say you don't like my friends.

24
00:01:43,390 --> 00:01:46,030
I do not. It's no concern of mine who
your friends are.

25
00:01:46,390 --> 00:01:48,090
Anyway, I like Sammy.

26
00:01:48,091 --> 00:01:50,589
I haven't gone out with Sammy since
third year.

27
00:01:50,590 --> 00:01:53,490
Oh? Who do you go out with on Saturdays,
then?

28
00:01:54,230 --> 00:01:55,850
Steve and his brother.

29
00:01:56,110 --> 00:01:58,330
What? Steve on the corner?

30
00:01:58,610 --> 00:01:59,660
Yeah.

31
00:01:59,661 --> 00:02:01,859
He was caught stealing a car, wasn't he?

32
00:02:01,860 --> 00:02:04,860
No. He borrowed it. We've got to tell
his uncle.

33
00:02:05,100 --> 00:02:06,300
You mean you were there?

34
00:02:06,800 --> 00:02:08,699
No. It was just a misunderstanding.

35
00:02:08,700 --> 00:02:12,059
Anyway, there's worse things that could
happen to me.

36
00:02:12,060 --> 00:02:13,140
I'd like to know what.

37
00:02:14,440 --> 00:02:19,499
A boy in Wisconsin got picked up by
aliens who sliced up his head -like span

38
00:02:19,500 --> 00:02:21,080
while he was still conscious.

39
00:02:21,380 --> 00:02:25,459
Oh, thank you. I hadn't even thought of
that one. And another boy in Mexico was

40
00:02:25,460 --> 00:02:28,350
attacked in the street by a flock of
radioactive parrots.

41
00:02:28,490 --> 00:02:29,630
which pecked out... Yes!

42
00:02:29,631 --> 00:02:34,189
Well, if you are going to stay at home,
I want you to sit there and be quiet.

43
00:02:34,190 --> 00:02:35,249
What's all that stuff?

44
00:02:35,250 --> 00:02:36,300
Rona's coming over.

45
00:02:36,301 --> 00:02:39,089
We're going to do the estimates of
whether we can afford to rent somewhere

46
00:02:39,090 --> 00:02:40,109
our work kitchen.

47
00:02:40,110 --> 00:02:41,670
We won't be able to have the TV on.

48
00:02:41,750 --> 00:02:45,110
But aren't we going to watch... What?

49
00:02:45,830 --> 00:02:50,730
In 1953, a woman in Tennessee gave birth
to a half -human creature.

50
00:02:51,250 --> 00:02:52,300
Don't we all?

51
00:02:54,570 --> 00:02:55,620
What are you saying?

52
00:02:55,970 --> 00:02:57,190
Nothing. I got confused.

53
00:02:57,690 --> 00:03:01,180
Oh. God, I might have known you'd be
hanging around to see what happens.

54
00:03:01,330 --> 00:03:03,070
Aren't you getting ready to go out?

55
00:03:03,330 --> 00:03:06,969
Laura and Harry have taken Clive to
visit his aunt and uncle and their

56
00:03:06,970 --> 00:03:10,909
child. I'm not particularly pleased to
be forced to stain and witness in all

57
00:03:10,910 --> 00:03:11,769
your greed.

58
00:03:11,770 --> 00:03:14,170
All right, what's going on?

59
00:03:16,110 --> 00:03:17,510
Told me what?

60
00:03:19,490 --> 00:03:22,550
We could tell you, but we assumed you
knew.

61
00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:26,230
But as you don't know, well...

62
00:03:26,650 --> 00:03:28,030
It's not really for us to say.

63
00:03:29,230 --> 00:03:30,280
You do understand.

64
00:03:31,010 --> 00:03:33,190
Oh, yes, that's very mature of you both.

65
00:03:33,810 --> 00:03:36,400
I quite understand you not wanting to
get involved.

66
00:03:36,401 --> 00:03:40,429
I suppose I'll just have to use up the
time before your father gets back

67
00:03:40,430 --> 00:03:41,480
somehow.

68
00:04:19,410 --> 00:04:21,479
Curb my dad.

69
00:04:21,480 --> 00:04:24,200
Ah, it's all right. I did remember to
get it. Get what?

70
00:04:24,560 --> 00:04:26,120
What you asked me to. Oh, really?

71
00:04:26,280 --> 00:04:32,819
Yeah. It's out in the car. I'm just
going to go and get it now, and I'll

72
00:04:32,820 --> 00:04:33,870
it back in.

73
00:04:44,740 --> 00:04:47,780
Um, what size one was it again?

74
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:49,250
What size?

75
00:04:49,440 --> 00:04:50,660
Of what? And that.

76
00:04:51,120 --> 00:04:52,940
I didn't ask you to get me anything.

77
00:04:53,160 --> 00:04:56,770
That's why I didn't. I was asking if
there was anything you wanted to tell

78
00:04:58,680 --> 00:04:59,920
Happy birthday.

79
00:05:00,880 --> 00:05:03,960
Happy Valentine's. Happy... This is
cruelty.

80
00:05:04,260 --> 00:05:06,550
She means she knows about the lottery
ticket.

81
00:05:06,551 --> 00:05:09,859
Ah. We didn't want to tell her. Yes,
well, I was going to tell you as soon as

82
00:05:09,860 --> 00:05:12,719
got back in. Ben. Yes, well, you see,
David and I went past the shop yesterday

83
00:05:12,720 --> 00:05:14,680
and I said, didn't I? I said, why not?

84
00:05:14,681 --> 00:05:18,299
Ben. I mean, there's no harm in it. It
doesn't cost a lot of money. It's just a

85
00:05:18,300 --> 00:05:19,229
bit of fun.

86
00:05:19,230 --> 00:05:20,450
bit of fun. Yeah.

87
00:05:21,750 --> 00:05:23,030
Come and sit down.

88
00:05:23,270 --> 00:05:26,469
Oh, God, do we have to? Why can't we
just...

89
00:05:26,470 --> 00:05:35,649
We

90
00:05:35,650 --> 00:05:40,689
talked the whole thing over together and
we all agreed that none of us would

91
00:05:40,690 --> 00:05:43,190
ever buy a lottery ticket, remember?

92
00:05:43,590 --> 00:05:47,309
Yes, but... Nothing but a tack on
stupidity. Yeah, but... Totally

93
00:05:47,310 --> 00:05:48,510
way to give to charity.

94
00:05:48,511 --> 00:05:50,909
Yes, but... And the chances of ever
winning are tiny.

95
00:05:50,910 --> 00:05:51,960
Yes.

96
00:05:52,850 --> 00:05:54,030
But... But what?

97
00:05:54,890 --> 00:05:58,549
But it's a rollover week. I can't stand
this. It's just the same as the last

98
00:05:58,550 --> 00:06:02,069
time we discussed it. No, it isn't. We
didn't talk about rollover weeks. Well,

99
00:06:02,070 --> 00:06:04,309
what's the difference with a rollover
week? A lot.

100
00:06:04,310 --> 00:06:05,149
Such as?

101
00:06:05,150 --> 00:06:06,710
It's a question of mathematics.

102
00:06:06,890 --> 00:06:07,940
Oh, how?

103
00:06:08,710 --> 00:06:11,950
Well, nobody won last week.

104
00:06:12,230 --> 00:06:15,790
Yes. Well, don't you see? That's why I
bought a ticket.

105
00:06:17,450 --> 00:06:22,170
What you're saying is, last week
millions of people paid out all that

106
00:06:22,350 --> 00:06:25,190
Yes. And nobody got anything back at
all. Exactly.

107
00:06:25,490 --> 00:06:31,329
And this has encouraged you to buy a
ticket this week. No, Martin, that's not

108
00:06:31,330 --> 00:06:34,129
at all. You see, you make it sound like
it's a waste of money.

109
00:06:34,130 --> 00:06:37,329
It is. No, it isn't, because nobody won
last week, so there's more money to be

110
00:06:37,330 --> 00:06:40,649
won this week. Nobody could win again.
Yes, but they might not win a lot more.

111
00:06:40,650 --> 00:06:43,240
Then next week there'd be even more
money. Of course.

112
00:06:43,241 --> 00:06:47,639
Yes, but you've got an even better
chance of winning.

113
00:06:47,640 --> 00:06:51,860
Why? Because nobody won last week. How
does that make it a better chance?

114
00:06:52,280 --> 00:06:53,330
Look.

115
00:06:53,620 --> 00:06:54,670
Look.

116
00:06:55,040 --> 00:07:01,259
Say 30 million people bought a ticket
last week. That means you've got a 30

117
00:07:01,260 --> 00:07:02,880
million to one chance of winning.

118
00:07:03,120 --> 00:07:04,170
No, it doesn't.

119
00:07:04,740 --> 00:07:05,790
How do you know?

120
00:07:05,791 --> 00:07:08,919
We did it in maths. It's not how many
people there are, but how many balls.

121
00:07:08,920 --> 00:07:14,300
49. Right. So there's 49 balls and 30
million people. That's, uh...

122
00:07:14,930 --> 00:07:17,850
Three -fifths of a ball for every
million people.

123
00:07:17,851 --> 00:07:21,089
Well, they only get the two -sixths of
the balls.

124
00:07:21,090 --> 00:07:27,989
Right, so that's three -fifths of a ball
divided by six million...

125
00:07:27,990 --> 00:07:30,410
Oh, is that multiply?

126
00:07:31,010 --> 00:07:35,369
You have a one in 49 chance of picking
the first ball, then a one in 48 for the

127
00:07:35,370 --> 00:07:36,910
second, and so on for all six.

128
00:07:37,370 --> 00:07:38,950
So you multiply 49 by 48.

129
00:07:39,230 --> 00:07:40,310
49 by 48.

130
00:07:40,650 --> 00:07:41,700
The total by 47.

131
00:07:41,870 --> 00:07:44,490
Then by 46. Then by 45.

132
00:07:44,750 --> 00:07:45,810
And then by 44.

133
00:07:46,250 --> 00:07:47,810
45 by 44.

134
00:07:51,810 --> 00:07:53,190
Yeah, that can't be right.

135
00:07:53,191 --> 00:07:56,749
Not quite. You divide that by two
because it doesn't matter which order

136
00:07:56,750 --> 00:07:57,800
them.

137
00:07:58,110 --> 00:07:59,790
And that's your chance of winning.

138
00:08:00,250 --> 00:08:01,570
Yeah, but that's not so bad.

139
00:08:03,710 --> 00:08:04,930
Five billion.

140
00:08:07,990 --> 00:08:12,030
1 ,173 ,760 to 1.

141
00:08:14,210 --> 00:08:19,069
Yes, well, it sounds a lot when you read
it out. It is a lot. Yes, but there's

142
00:08:19,070 --> 00:08:20,120
the bonus ball.

143
00:08:20,210 --> 00:08:23,730
What do you mean, aha?

144
00:08:23,731 --> 00:08:27,009
How exactly does that make any
difference? Well, it makes the world a

145
00:08:27,010 --> 00:08:28,060
difference. How?

146
00:08:28,110 --> 00:08:32,889
Well, you... Multiply that by 43 and
divide by 6 factorials. You see, there's

147
00:08:32,890 --> 00:08:33,940
the factorials.

148
00:08:33,941 --> 00:08:38,829
The chance you have of winning is always
the same. Yes, but on rollover week,

149
00:08:38,830 --> 00:08:39,788
you can win a lot more.

150
00:08:39,789 --> 00:08:40,829
How can you be sure?

151
00:08:40,830 --> 00:08:42,370
Because nobody won last week.

152
00:08:42,630 --> 00:08:46,030
But everybody might win this week. Then
you'd all have to share it.

153
00:08:46,370 --> 00:08:47,420
Yes.

154
00:08:48,530 --> 00:08:52,050
But... It's a rollover week.

155
00:08:53,170 --> 00:08:55,280
What's it matter? He's got the ticket
now.

156
00:08:55,550 --> 00:08:56,600
Yes, you're right.

157
00:08:56,601 --> 00:09:00,489
Well, I think the best thing is if you
give it to me and I'll throw it away.

158
00:09:00,490 --> 00:09:01,169
You what?

159
00:09:01,170 --> 00:09:03,629
I'll throw it away. You've seen the
chance you have of winning. Yes, but we

160
00:09:03,630 --> 00:09:04,680
still could win.

161
00:09:04,681 --> 00:09:07,999
Pointless. Why don't we vote on it?
Who's right there? Who says we should

162
00:09:08,000 --> 00:09:09,050
the ticket?

163
00:09:09,660 --> 00:09:11,040
I thought you agreed with me.

164
00:09:11,220 --> 00:09:12,780
Not to buy one in the first place.

165
00:09:13,120 --> 00:09:14,920
What time's the draw? Eight o 'clock.

166
00:09:15,280 --> 00:09:19,800
Oh, all right. I'll ring Rona and see if
we can do our financial things at her.

167
00:09:19,801 --> 00:09:21,479
Don't you want to see if we win?

168
00:09:21,480 --> 00:09:23,500
It's not exactly going to be a surprise.

169
00:09:23,501 --> 00:09:27,199
You might as well give Sooty a soda
siphon. I hope he's going to make you a

170
00:09:27,200 --> 00:09:28,250
drink.

171
00:09:43,471 --> 00:09:47,439
Thought you'd given up trying for a
baby.

172
00:09:47,440 --> 00:09:50,760
He's going through every record since
1971.

173
00:09:51,340 --> 00:09:53,080
Does Norris McWhirter know?

174
00:09:53,640 --> 00:09:55,280
His DJ records.

175
00:09:55,281 --> 00:09:58,659
They're all over everywhere, being
catalogued. You can't even get through

176
00:09:58,660 --> 00:10:01,779
front door without squashing Martha
Reeves and the Vandellas.

177
00:10:01,780 --> 00:10:03,500
Well, that answers my question.

178
00:10:03,860 --> 00:10:05,300
Have you seen Cliff Richard?

179
00:10:05,580 --> 00:10:07,820
He's on the bathroom floor with Take
That.

180
00:10:09,040 --> 00:10:10,090
What question?

181
00:10:10,240 --> 00:10:14,210
Nothing. For the first time in living
memory, everyone's staying home tonight.

182
00:10:14,620 --> 00:10:16,200
To watch the lottery result.

183
00:10:16,201 --> 00:10:20,479
Oh, well, you're always complaining you
don't see enough of them on Saturday

184
00:10:20,480 --> 00:10:23,759
night. I know. I suppose we'll just have
to go upstairs or something.

185
00:10:23,760 --> 00:10:25,420
Yeah. Well, see you later, then.

186
00:10:25,680 --> 00:10:28,120
Any idea what Madonna is under at the
moment?

187
00:10:28,380 --> 00:10:30,120
Could be anything, by all accounts.

188
00:10:35,220 --> 00:10:42,180
Why is everyone looking at me?

189
00:10:43,690 --> 00:10:46,160
We, uh, were wondering if there might be
any food.

190
00:10:49,110 --> 00:10:50,250
Doesn't have to be much.

191
00:10:59,730 --> 00:11:06,729
Is there

192
00:11:06,730 --> 00:11:07,780
anything else?

193
00:11:07,781 --> 00:11:11,869
Yes, there's still the melamine coating
on the shelves, if you'd like to nibble

194
00:11:11,870 --> 00:11:12,920
that off.

195
00:11:23,240 --> 00:11:25,350
sandwiches. Oh, we thought we'd had
yours.

196
00:11:25,700 --> 00:11:26,750
Oh,

197
00:11:27,120 --> 00:11:28,170
it doesn't matter.

198
00:11:31,751 --> 00:11:33,359
You

199
00:11:33,360 --> 00:11:40,339
know what I'd do with

200
00:11:40,340 --> 00:11:40,779
the money?

201
00:11:40,780 --> 00:11:46,179
You already told us yesterday you'd buy
Spurs three new players, except they'd

202
00:11:46,180 --> 00:11:50,379
have little shirts printed on their
backs with, presented to Tottenham

203
00:11:50,380 --> 00:11:52,320
by Ben S. Porter.

204
00:11:53,080 --> 00:11:54,800
Essential heating repairs.

205
00:11:56,540 --> 00:11:59,730
Well, I'd keep the job, obviously. I
wouldn't let it go to my head.

206
00:11:59,840 --> 00:12:01,780
Go to your head? Why stop at the shirt?

207
00:12:01,781 --> 00:12:05,099
Why don't you just have your name
permanently tattooed onto them?

208
00:12:05,100 --> 00:12:06,150
Can I do it?

209
00:12:06,460 --> 00:12:08,480
Why not just buy it first completely?

210
00:12:08,980 --> 00:12:12,420
What? And get knocked into a takeover
battle with Alan Sugar?

211
00:12:14,480 --> 00:12:16,700
He even saw off Terry Venables.

212
00:12:22,001 --> 00:12:27,749
I've changed my mind now. I'm thinking
about it more seriously.

213
00:12:27,750 --> 00:12:31,209
You see, the mistake people usually make
is they go straight away for something

214
00:12:31,210 --> 00:12:33,729
too big. You know, something that
flatters their ego.

215
00:12:33,730 --> 00:12:36,080
No, you need something a bit more
understated.

216
00:12:36,150 --> 00:12:39,340
Like your indoor shopping mall, leisure
centre and theme park.

217
00:12:39,550 --> 00:12:42,440
No, even a project like Porterworld has
its limitations.

218
00:12:43,630 --> 00:12:46,040
Porterworld? You'll have to call it
something.

219
00:12:46,050 --> 00:12:49,889
Now, this is my current plan. I'd keep
the business as it is now, but now I'll

220
00:12:49,890 --> 00:12:52,210
be able to charge exactly what I wanted.

221
00:12:52,211 --> 00:12:56,239
So if people were nice to me or poor,
I'd say, that's all right, there'll be

222
00:12:56,240 --> 00:12:57,800
charge, courtesy of Ben Porter.

223
00:12:58,380 --> 00:13:03,400
But if they were some snidey yuppie, I'd
say, oh, dear, what a pity.

224
00:13:03,401 --> 00:13:06,259
I was going to do it for free, but
seeing as I don't like the look of you,

225
00:13:06,260 --> 00:13:07,340
that'll be full price.

226
00:13:08,400 --> 00:13:09,450
That's terrible.

227
00:13:09,920 --> 00:13:10,970
Why?

228
00:13:10,971 --> 00:13:14,559
What if they were poor, but you didn't
like them? They should make me like

229
00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:15,610
That's fascism.

230
00:13:15,611 --> 00:13:18,999
No, it isn't. You're using your money to
control people. No, I'm not. I'm using

231
00:13:19,000 --> 00:13:19,859
it as a charity.

232
00:13:19,860 --> 00:13:22,489
Then why don't you just give it to the
people who need it?

233
00:13:22,490 --> 00:13:25,129
The people who spend every day
completely hopeless.

234
00:13:25,130 --> 00:13:26,570
Now we're back to Spurs again.

235
00:13:29,290 --> 00:13:31,030
They've done a lot better recently.

236
00:13:31,031 --> 00:13:32,969
Oh, they couldn't have got much worse.

237
00:13:32,970 --> 00:13:34,009
You're no son of mine.

238
00:13:34,010 --> 00:13:36,809
You don't want to be the son of a
manipulative capitalist.

239
00:13:36,810 --> 00:13:41,349
Look, I agreed we'd watch the lottery
draw, but until then I'd be very

240
00:13:41,350 --> 00:13:43,940
if everyone would just keep the
conversation down.

241
00:13:50,390 --> 00:13:52,070
Couldn't do it in a charity anyway.

242
00:13:52,170 --> 00:13:53,220
What?

243
00:13:53,350 --> 00:13:54,400
Death duties.

244
00:13:55,490 --> 00:13:56,540
Yes!

245
00:14:01,070 --> 00:14:03,150
What are you talking about?

246
00:14:03,410 --> 00:14:04,460
Death duties.

247
00:14:04,770 --> 00:14:05,990
What death duties?

248
00:14:05,991 --> 00:14:09,509
Well, if you give some money away and
you die within seven years, then they

249
00:14:09,510 --> 00:14:10,890
to pay tax on the full amount.

250
00:14:11,570 --> 00:14:12,930
I'm 17 and a half.

251
00:14:13,210 --> 00:14:15,440
What's going to happen to me in seven
years?

252
00:14:15,750 --> 00:14:20,170
You could catch a freak virus that ages
you like an 80 -year -old.

253
00:14:21,780 --> 00:14:26,600
Listen here. This man caught it, and six
months later, he looked like this. Oh,

254
00:14:26,601 --> 00:14:27,539
my God!

255
00:14:27,540 --> 00:14:31,179
They said it escaped from a government
-turned -warfare laboratory by accident

256
00:14:31,180 --> 00:14:32,780
in a diseased mouse.

257
00:14:33,200 --> 00:14:34,250
Shut up!

258
00:14:34,500 --> 00:14:37,690
And we've got a mouse in the kitchen,
haven't we? Make him stop!

259
00:14:37,740 --> 00:14:40,400
And I think its eyes glow in the dark.

260
00:14:40,700 --> 00:14:41,750
David!

261
00:14:42,220 --> 00:14:46,820
Well, it doesn't have to be that. It can
be any strange, unexplainable accident.

262
00:14:46,821 --> 00:14:51,689
I notice you've been very quiet about
what you'd spend the money on.

263
00:14:51,690 --> 00:14:57,369
Ah, just the same as anyone else. Big
house, big car, big computer, a pizza

264
00:14:57,370 --> 00:14:58,990
factory and lots of prostitutes.

265
00:15:01,370 --> 00:15:02,430
Are you joking?

266
00:15:11,110 --> 00:15:14,890
Of course, the wise man would put it all
into a trust.

267
00:15:15,370 --> 00:15:17,890
What exactly is a trust? Well, it...

268
00:15:19,400 --> 00:15:22,710
Like the Wellcome Trust or the Roundtree
Trust. And Trust House 40.

269
00:15:22,711 --> 00:15:25,799
I still haven't forgotten that crack
about spurs yet, you know. Well, what

270
00:15:25,800 --> 00:15:28,939
you going to buy them next? A smaller
goal? Well, I might just do that.

271
00:15:28,940 --> 00:15:29,990
That's enough!

272
00:15:30,720 --> 00:15:34,639
I think we've wasted quite enough time
this evening talking about the stupid

273
00:15:34,640 --> 00:15:35,860
lottery money.

274
00:15:36,180 --> 00:15:40,860
You'll get half of it. There is no half.
We're not going to win, don't you see?

275
00:15:40,920 --> 00:15:44,940
That's exactly why they make such a lot
of money. It's all complete fantasy.

276
00:15:44,941 --> 00:15:49,129
This is the real money situation right
here, and it's not looking very

277
00:15:49,130 --> 00:15:50,180
promising.

278
00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:58,450
Don't eat, page 111.

279
00:16:00,810 --> 00:16:01,860
What are you doing?

280
00:16:01,861 --> 00:16:04,049
We're just looking at sea facts. We'll
be very quiet.

281
00:16:04,050 --> 00:16:06,590
Seeing how much the jackpot is? Yep.

282
00:16:06,591 --> 00:16:07,869
Here it comes.

283
00:16:07,870 --> 00:16:09,860
Well, don't tell me. I don't want to
know.

284
00:16:11,250 --> 00:16:13,070
Wow. Is that a mistake?

285
00:16:13,630 --> 00:16:14,680
No, that's it.

286
00:16:15,441 --> 00:16:17,529
How much is it?

287
00:16:17,530 --> 00:16:20,000
You told us not to tell you. No, I don't
want to know.

288
00:16:29,210 --> 00:16:32,470
Oh, my God, that can't be right. It is.

289
00:16:32,990 --> 00:16:34,040
That's enormous.

290
00:16:34,470 --> 00:16:35,520
It's run over a week.

291
00:16:36,550 --> 00:16:38,780
That's more money than you can even
imagine.

292
00:16:39,190 --> 00:16:41,490
Just think what we could do if we had
that.

293
00:16:43,430 --> 00:16:44,480
Just a minute.

294
00:16:44,970 --> 00:16:46,020
What do you mean?

295
00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:47,660
If we had that.

296
00:16:48,420 --> 00:16:51,400
What? Well, I bought the ticket. You
were dead against it.

297
00:16:51,600 --> 00:16:54,660
You just said I could have half. No, I
didn't. Yes, you did.

298
00:16:55,080 --> 00:17:00,419
No, what I actually said... A moment
ago, you said in front of everybody that

299
00:17:00,420 --> 00:17:01,980
I'd be getting half, didn't he?

300
00:17:02,060 --> 00:17:03,110
Yeah.

301
00:17:03,260 --> 00:17:05,560
Yeah, but you don't need half of all
that.

302
00:17:05,800 --> 00:17:09,799
What do you mean, I don't need it? Well,
we'll buy a new house, new things, new

303
00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:10,920
furniture. Yes.

304
00:17:11,660 --> 00:17:14,070
Well, you'll be getting the benefits of
it, too.

305
00:17:14,071 --> 00:17:17,049
Oh, so I don't have to move out and live
under an old sack in the coal shed,

306
00:17:17,050 --> 00:17:19,670
then? Oh, no, hear me out.

307
00:17:19,671 --> 00:17:23,009
And I'll give you some money now and
again, you know, to get yourself some

308
00:17:23,010 --> 00:17:24,060
things.

309
00:17:26,410 --> 00:17:27,609
No, I want my half.

310
00:17:27,610 --> 00:17:29,209
What do you want with all that money?

311
00:17:29,210 --> 00:17:30,830
I'd like to use it on the business.

312
00:17:30,831 --> 00:17:31,809
What business?

313
00:17:31,810 --> 00:17:33,070
The catering business.

314
00:17:34,190 --> 00:17:38,090
You can't carry on in the catering
business in our position.

315
00:17:38,470 --> 00:17:39,970
What will the neighbours say?

316
00:17:43,880 --> 00:17:45,040
neighbours in Surrey.

317
00:17:45,820 --> 00:17:48,050
Surrey? Well, that's where our new house
is.

318
00:17:48,180 --> 00:17:52,100
I don't want to live in Surrey. All
right, well, wherever it is.

319
00:17:52,101 --> 00:17:55,879
Mixing with those sort of people, you
have to find a more suitable business.

320
00:17:55,880 --> 00:17:59,179
What was all that about you keeping your
business, then? Yes, well, that's

321
00:17:59,180 --> 00:18:02,079
before I saw the figure. Obviously, that
amount of money would change our lives

322
00:18:02,080 --> 00:18:03,500
if it came to me. It won't.

323
00:18:04,260 --> 00:18:06,880
Yes, but if it did... No, it won't come
to you.

324
00:18:07,100 --> 00:18:10,200
Eh? He bought the ticket, but I gave him
the pound.

325
00:18:10,201 --> 00:18:12,019
Yeah, but I didn't want to break a 20.

326
00:18:12,020 --> 00:18:14,240
So? The fake money was mine.

327
00:18:15,340 --> 00:18:17,320
Yes, well, I'd give you some, obviously.

328
00:18:17,321 --> 00:18:20,199
You can have some of my half. There's no
such thing as your half.

329
00:18:20,200 --> 00:18:21,039
I see.

330
00:18:21,040 --> 00:18:22,280
Go on, David.

331
00:18:22,680 --> 00:18:26,960
I took the risk with my capital, so the
whole lot is mine. Ah, yes.

332
00:18:27,320 --> 00:18:30,020
But legally, you're too young to buy a
ticket.

333
00:18:30,300 --> 00:18:31,980
We'll see if they say that in court.

334
00:18:32,140 --> 00:18:34,660
Court? I'm going to sue you. Your own
father?

335
00:18:36,341 --> 00:18:38,659
You've got no witnesses.

336
00:18:38,660 --> 00:18:39,860
Short word against mine.

337
00:18:39,940 --> 00:18:42,830
Perhaps. But it's not going to look very
good in the papers.

338
00:18:43,120 --> 00:18:47,739
Papers? I bet the son would pay good
money for an exclusive interview with

339
00:18:47,740 --> 00:18:49,680
son of Dirty Dad. Dirty Dad!

340
00:18:50,240 --> 00:18:53,000
He stole from his own son to make
himself rich.

341
00:18:54,040 --> 00:18:56,090
I'll give you a million to keep quiet.
Yes.

342
00:18:56,091 --> 00:18:58,059
What about lunch? You can take me to
court too.

343
00:18:58,060 --> 00:19:00,459
Yeah, all right, I'll give you all a
million. You said I could have half. I'm

344
00:19:00,460 --> 00:19:01,159
witness to that.

345
00:19:01,160 --> 00:19:04,679
All right, well, you can have half and
you can have a million each. Then that's

346
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:06,060
my complete and final offer.

347
00:19:06,061 --> 00:19:08,199
What do you think? What do you think?

348
00:19:08,200 --> 00:19:09,639
You have to have it in writing.

349
00:19:09,640 --> 00:19:11,140
What? What are we doing?

350
00:19:11,920 --> 00:19:15,350
Fifteen minutes ago we were a family,
now we're an episode of Dallas.

351
00:19:16,100 --> 00:19:18,330
It's all the fault of this terrible
lottery.

352
00:19:18,500 --> 00:19:20,020
I knew it was a bad idea.

353
00:19:20,460 --> 00:19:22,690
Surely we know by now we can trust each
other.

354
00:19:22,800 --> 00:19:23,850
Exactly.

355
00:19:25,360 --> 00:19:27,820
Well, maybe it would save a lot of
argument.

356
00:19:28,300 --> 00:19:29,350
Oh, Bill!

357
00:19:29,580 --> 00:19:32,050
And that's the last I want to hear on
this subject.

358
00:19:35,380 --> 00:19:38,150
Hang on, are both your millions coming
out of my heart?

359
00:19:38,160 --> 00:19:39,210
We don't care.

360
00:19:39,211 --> 00:19:43,599
worse off than your mother, aren't they?
The one who bought the ticket.

361
00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:45,710
Well, this is nothing short of
extortion.

362
00:19:48,371 --> 00:19:50,419
There you are.

363
00:19:50,420 --> 00:19:51,470
Satisfied?

364
00:19:57,560 --> 00:20:01,539
Ben, you do remember where you put the
ticket, don't you? It's in the pocket of

365
00:20:01,540 --> 00:20:02,319
my work jeans.

366
00:20:02,320 --> 00:20:03,370
Oh, good.

367
00:20:56,561 --> 00:20:58,569
numbers you chose.

368
00:20:58,570 --> 00:21:00,649
No, I just chose them off the top of my
head. Could be anything.

369
00:21:00,650 --> 00:21:01,700
Oh, could they?

370
00:21:01,701 --> 00:21:03,709
I thought you didn't want to talk about
this anymore.

371
00:21:03,710 --> 00:21:04,760
No, I don't.

372
00:21:05,330 --> 00:21:07,740
Hello. What are you doing? Just stay
right there.

373
00:21:07,930 --> 00:21:08,980
Just get the things.

374
00:21:09,150 --> 00:21:10,200
What?

375
00:21:10,201 --> 00:21:13,489
We're just going to be at Rona's for a
while. You'll miss the draw.

376
00:21:13,490 --> 00:21:16,709
Oh, don't worry. I'm sure I'll be back.
You don't want to miss Mystic Meg.

377
00:21:16,710 --> 00:21:18,450
Who could with that hair? Come on.

378
00:21:21,490 --> 00:21:22,990
Hurry up. There isn't much time.

379
00:21:23,010 --> 00:21:24,630
I told you there's no room at mine.

380
00:21:24,810 --> 00:21:25,970
Get in your car, quick.

381
00:21:49,290 --> 00:21:51,690
selling tickets until 7 .30.

382
00:21:52,970 --> 00:21:54,390
I want to know the numbers.

383
00:21:54,690 --> 00:21:57,520
It can be anything. It doesn't really...
There's somewhere.

384
00:22:45,040 --> 00:22:46,090
Now where?

385
00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:48,140
A bit further on.

386
00:22:49,820 --> 00:22:50,870
Look.

387
00:22:51,220 --> 00:22:52,740
Time. You sure it's open?

388
00:22:52,940 --> 00:22:55,840
Yeah, I can see some people buying...
Don't come in! What?

389
00:22:56,500 --> 00:22:57,550
Go on!

390
00:22:59,440 --> 00:23:01,500
Laura and Harry with Clive. So?

391
00:23:01,900 --> 00:23:02,960
Pull in over there.

392
00:23:04,580 --> 00:23:06,560
They think I'm in your house, remember?

393
00:23:39,110 --> 00:23:41,790
Anything you want me to get? I might
come in.

394
00:23:41,791 --> 00:23:43,839
Have a look at this bunch of good
flowers.

395
00:23:43,840 --> 00:23:45,400
What about the little monster?

396
00:23:49,280 --> 00:23:52,580
Just explain to them. They already think
I'm strange.

397
00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:54,610
What are they doing?

398
00:23:54,840 --> 00:23:56,160
Just putting in the petrol.

399
00:23:56,161 --> 00:23:57,419
Nobody's watching.

400
00:23:57,420 --> 00:23:58,470
Nobody at all?

401
00:25:21,141 --> 00:25:23,149
to the toilet.

402
00:25:23,150 --> 00:25:24,390
Hang around here.

403
00:25:51,351 --> 00:25:53,019
my work jeans?

404
00:25:53,020 --> 00:25:55,759
Oh, well, it's not in them, I forgot to
tell you. What do you mean?

405
00:25:55,760 --> 00:25:57,320
Looking for this by any chance?

406
00:25:57,321 --> 00:25:58,739
Where did you get that?

407
00:25:58,740 --> 00:26:01,939
Oh, thank you, Christine, for rushing
over here on a bus seat that would give

408
00:26:01,940 --> 00:26:03,860
haemorrhoids to Lucinda Pryor Palmer.

409
00:26:04,040 --> 00:26:05,090
Yeah, yeah.

410
00:26:05,280 --> 00:26:08,710
Somebody put it in my wage packet
instead of my post -it when I made it

411
00:26:08,711 --> 00:26:10,479
They're starting up the machine.

412
00:26:10,480 --> 00:26:11,159
Give me that.

413
00:26:11,160 --> 00:26:13,220
Uh -uh -uh -uh. What are the magic
words?

414
00:26:13,700 --> 00:26:14,840
I'll give you a million.

415
00:26:31,050 --> 00:26:33,990
The second ball out tonight is number
15.

416
00:27:01,871 --> 00:27:03,969
Bill?

417
00:27:03,970 --> 00:27:08,520
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